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OT: Joke, Alaska Sightseeing

Alaska sightseeing

The Pope took a couple of days off to visit the mountains of Alaska for some sight-seeing. He was cruising along the campground in the Pope mobile when there was a frantic commotion just at the edge of the woods. A helpless Democrat, wearing sandals, shorts, a "Save the Whales" hat and a "To Hell with Bush" T-shirt, was screaming while struggling frantically, thrashing around trying to free himself from the grasp of a 10 foot grizzly.

As the Pope watched horrified, a group of Republican loggers came racing up. One quickly fired a 44 magnum into the bear's chest... The other two reached up and pulled the bleeding, semiconscious Democrat from the bear's grasp. Then using long clubs, the three loggers finished off the bear and two of them threw it onto the bed of their truck while the other tenderly placed the injured Democrat in the back seat.

As they prepared to leave, the Pope summoned them to come over. "I give you my blessing for your brave actions!" he told them. "I heard there was a bitter hatred between Republican loggers and Democratic Environmental activists but now I've seen with my own eyes that this is not true."

As the Pope drove off, one of the loggers asked his buddies "Who was that guy?"

"It was the Pope," another replied. "He's in direct contact with heaven and has access to all wisdom."

"Well," the logger said, "he may have access to all wisdom but he sure doesn't know shit about bear hunting! By the way, is the bait holding up, or do we need to go back to Massachusetts and snatch another one?

...Jim Thompson

--
|  James E.Thompson, P.E.                           |    mens     |
|  Analog Innovations, Inc.                         |     et      |
|  Analog/Mixed-Signal ASIC\'s and Discrete Systems  |    manus    |
|  Phoenix, Arizona            Voice:(480)460-2350  |             |
|  E-mail Address at Website     Fax:(480)460-2142  |  Brass Rat  |
|       http://www.analog-innovations.com           |    1962     |
             
I love to cook with wine.      Sometimes I even put it in the food.
Reply to
Jim Thompson
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"Jim Thompson" wrote in message news: snipped-for-privacy@4ax.com...

Exactly the kind of barbaric behaviour you'd expect from lunatic fringe right wing extremists!!!

Reply to
ian field

That is so lame you must of dreamped it up yourself. The questions really are: does the Pope shit in the woods or is the bear a Catholic?

Reply to
Bob Eld

He's just sore because GWB now has to ask the Democrat house for permission when he wants to go wee wee!

Reply to
ian field

"Jim Thompson" wrote in message news: snipped-for-privacy@4ax.com...

Jim, I am ashamed of you. I thought that you knew that bears won't eat those dammed things.

Tom

Reply to
Tom Biasi

I don't care what Ian and Bob thought of it, I still got a chuckle out of it.

--
James T. White
Reply to
James T. White

Oooops! Not only did I forget the bad taste, but the smell must unappetizing as well ;-)

However, as one quite familiar with bears, at least black bears, I don't think smell would be an issue ;-)

...Jim Thompson

--
|  James E.Thompson, P.E.                           |    mens     |
|  Analog Innovations, Inc.                         |     et      |
|  Analog/Mixed-Signal ASIC\'s and Discrete Systems  |    manus    |
|  Phoenix, Arizona            Voice:(480)460-2350  |             |
|  E-mail Address at Website     Fax:(480)460-2142  |  Brass Rat  |
|       http://www.analog-innovations.com           |    1962     |
             
I love to cook with wine.      Sometimes I even put it in the food.
Reply to
Jim Thompson

"Jim Thompson" wrote in message news: snipped-for-privacy@4ax.com...

....

America's Most Intelligent President An aeroplane is going to crash. There are five passengers on board, but unfortunately only 4 parachutes. The first passenger says "I'm Shaquille O'Neill, the best NBA basketball player. The Lakers need me, it would be unfair to them if I died". So he takes the first parachute and jumps. The second passenger, Hillary Clinton, says "I am the wife of the former President of the United States. I am also the most dedicated woman in the world, a Senator in New York and America's potential future President. She takes one of the parachutes and jumps.

The third passenger, George W. Bush, says " I am the President of the United States of America. I have a huge responsibility in world politics. And apart from that, I am the most intelligent President in the history of the country and I have a responsibility to my people not to die". So he takes a parachute and jumps.

The fourth passenger, the Pope, says to the fifth passenger, a ten year old schoolboy "I am already old. I have already lived my life, as a good person and a priest I will give you the last parachute".

The boy replies "No problem, there is also a parachute for you. America's most intelligent President has taken my schoolbag ..."

Reply to
Homer J Simpson

"The Puritans hated bear-baiting, not because it gave pain to the bear, but because it gave pleasure to the spectators." -- Thomas Macaulay, "History of England"

Cheers! Rich

Reply to
The Pig Bladder from Uranus

If only............!

Reply to
ian field

The last time I heard this joke it was about Jessie Jackson, as the "Most important man in the US". If you're going to steal old jokes, find a better grade to steal.

--
Service to my country? Been there, Done that, and I\'ve got my DD214 to
prove it.
Member of DAV #85.

Michael A. Terrell
Central Florida
Reply to
Michael A. Terrell

If I'd been telling it, the stricken plane would have been over Tikrit and GWB would have got a real parachute.

Reply to
ian field

When you read this were you thinking specifically about Hah-ved? 8-)

Reply to
JeffM

No. Teddy and the leftist weenies ;-)

Yay Team! Let's hear it... Murtha for Majority leader!

...Jim Thompson

-- | James E.Thompson, P.E. | mens | | Analog Innovations, Inc. | et | | Analog/Mixed-Signal ASIC's and Discrete Systems | manus | | Phoenix, Arizona Voice:(480)460-2350 | | | E-mail Address at Website Fax:(480)460-2142 | Brass Rat | |

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| 1962 | I love to cook with wine. Sometimes I even put it in the food.

Reply to
Jim Thompson

JeffM wrote:

Jim Thomps>No. Teddy and the leftist weenies ;-)

Politicians only? Win will be relieved. 8-)

A decorated combat veteran in the vanguard of a "wartime" Congress?? There's a novel notion.

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Reply to
JeffM

Is their pussy as nice as a liberal weenie's ass?

Thanks, Pig Bladder

Reply to
The Pig Bladder from Uranus

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Just a bad shoulder? Hell, I was listed as 4F for five different medical problems, and I still served. My uncorrected vision was 20/200 and 20/400. I also had bad feet, breathing problems, a severe notch in my hearing, and a lifelong history of severe infections which made it very difficult to heal from even minor injuries.

--
Service to my country? Been there, Done that, and I\'ve got my DD214 to
prove it.
Member of DAV #85.

Michael A. Terrell
Central Florida
Reply to
Michael A. Terrell

You could still enlist these days.

Reply to
Homer J Simpson

Perhaps, and one of the most corrupt members of congress. Even Soros is pissed! ...and he bought it! LOL!

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--
  Keith
Reply to
krw

Tell them they do not have to go nearly so far, we have a good supply here in California.

--
 JosephKK
 Gegen dummheit kampfen die Gotter Selbst, vergebens.  
  --Schiller
Reply to
joseph2k

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