Improvising handset beep?

Nah! - You definitely won't get a sheep down the hosepipe!

OK, put a fan on the Kitchen side of things to waft the exceptionally nice smell of roasting Lamb down the pipe......

DNA

String and two cans...cheaper.

jak

Add a wet teabag and make the cans KT66.... higher fidelity.

DNA

Wouldn't thet depend a lot on how well they are pulzerized, and how good the pump is?

OK, guess that would be allowed under the current hosepipe ban we have around here.

The crunched up bones would make it too lumpy!

Then you need to try an American made food processor. They can take your fingers off if you're stupid enough to put your hand into the thing when its running.

Like the deep fat fryer that Moe in the Simpsons bought when opening a restaurant - can flash fry a buffalo in 40 seconds!

Better yet, get one made for the US market. Whack it with 240v and I'll bet it would pulverize granite...for a minute.

jak

Homer is always complaining that microwave ovens are too slow, too! ;-)

There you go then.....

If you're not using your hosepipe then you're not doing any gardening so you can plug it into the communication system. Bonus savings.

Unless the hosepipe ban is of a personal nature, nudge nudge, wink wink.

This I would understand if you are not Man enough to have a practice at doing the Sunday dinner. Go on.... go for it.

DNA

Heve you ever actually tried talking through 100 yards of garden hose?

Thanks, Rich

Yeah, but you have to use big funnels at each end. Seriously, they've done it on board ships for over a century. Granted, the speaking tubes are bigger than hoses, but the distances are much greater as well.

jak