How to repair a human brain???

A bullet to the temple area normally does the trick.

Surprisingly enough, cutting off ones fingers will at least mask the problem...by ensuring that the OP doesn't make stupid postings.

jak

UCLAN wrote:

YHBT:

If you feel *compelled* to respond to obvious trolls, first check the TO: line for a "scorecard" group.

**REMOVE** that before posting.

Opium and LSD will do wonders for you.

first you need to actually have a brain to repair, I would be looking at solving that problem before anything else...

Yeesh, where do these people come from? You give a 13 year old kid a computer (or someone with the mentality/maturity of a 13 year old kid) and looks what happens...

I vote for a bullet to the temple area as a solution to his/her/it's problem.

It is essential to obtain the authernticated service manual for your specific brain. It must match the date code and revision or else really won't be of much help. There have been so many ECOs over the millenia that one repair approach will not work.

Unfortunately, the only reputable dealer for these service manuals is on a small planet 37 lightyears from Earth and the shipping costs really do become excessive at that distance. So, even if you can identify the date code and revision, and can afford the manual and shipping, you won't see it for at least 74 years, assuming they haven't gone out of business. I won't even get into issues with respect to powering down your brain during servicing and arranging to reboot....... :)

--- sam | Sci.Electronics.Repair FAQ:

Repair | Main Table of Contents:

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In your case it was a Chinese knockoff. There were no manuals printed so it is a throw away, single use device. Spares are out of stock until the second coming, so please be (a) patient.

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There are two kinds of people on this earth: The crazy, and the insane. The first sign of insanity is denying that you're crazy.

Wrap a degaussing coil from a junked CRT Tv or monitor around your head, and send square waves through it to stimulate the damaged neurons. You'll be a genius again in no time.

what for? even the best ones only work right half the time, and most of them don't work at all.

Two bullets, just to be sure...

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nge

there used to be a guy in my dorm who would diagnose himself as being short on acetyl choline and try to fix it by swallowing some. god knows where he got it.

..

d

Come see who Zootal is! (Matthew Reed)