Three electric switches cure obesity

The three switches are on your car ignition, TV power, and refrigerator. This is a way to lose 60 pounds of blubber. Walk, bike, write, cook. Fill each switch with epoxy.

Reply to
omnilobe
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Great ideas!

  1. I have filled my ignition switch with epoxy.

The police have determined that my vehicle is unable to move from its location on the street, and is rapidly accruing parking tickets. One of them says they will tow the vehicle if I am unable to move it. It seems this is an effective way to lose money and property. I'll lose that pesky "blubber" soon this way, right?..

I am also unable to travel to work, in any reasonable manner. I have to get up at 6am to catch buses to my destination, and don't get home until 8pm. Working from home helps, but that doesn't help when our project is in the testing lab. I don't seem to be doing any more walking than sitting; mostly waiting for buses to arrive. Walking the 20 miles to work is preposterously out of the question.

  1. I have attempted to epoxy the TV, but it seems to be a capacitive touch button, so it remains operational. I'd sit in front of it more often, but with four hours of my day dedicated to travel, I can really only do that on the weekends. And I need to catch the bus to the grocery store, and whatever other errands are available on Saturday, so I don't even have much time for that. Let alone sanity-preserving activities like working on projects and drinking beer.

  1. My refrigerator doesn't seem to have a switch. I found the only switch-like thing on it and epoxied that. Now the light doesn't come on when I open it, making it hard to see what's in the back. It still gets cold though.

I wonder what's buried in the back. How long has it been in there? Is it still safe to eat?

I tried some to find out, but it sent me to the emergency room, and they sent me a ~$5000 bill.

I'm not sure how this is supposed to lose me 60 pounds of "blubber", or if I even have that much in my body; at my height I'd be an emaciated schoolgirl with that kind of weight loss. But without access to fresh fruits and vegetables, effective exercise, and most importantly of all, life-giving money, I'll probably die before reaching that point. :-\

This does not seem like a wise weight loss program for the average American, nor is it a wise money loss program for the already-nearly-impoverished average American. You may wish to try it yourself before recommending it to others...

Tim

--
Seven Transistor Labs, LLC 
Electrical Engineering Consultation and Design 
Website: https://www.seventransistorlabs.com/
Reply to
Tim Williams

[...]
  1. Hire a mechanic to replace your ignition switch. You need that car.

  1. Hire a personal trainer to help you get your willpower back. You need to exercise. walking is pretty good. When you start walking, your energy and stamina will both increase. You will be able to get more done. Right now, you have trained your mind to sit for long periods, but you have lost the ability to exercise. You need to get it back. You need help to do that.

Finding the right person may be tough. There might be self-help groups that can help. But do something.

Reply to
Steve Wilson

I filled my TV switch with epoxy. Now I can't turn it off.

Sylvia.

Reply to
Sylvia Else

That's about the most positive thing I've seen on this newsgroup in years. Thanks!

(Not sure if the sarcasm/hyperbole of my post came through, but I'll excuse it if it means wholesome posts like this. :-) )

Tim

--
Seven Transistor Labs, LLC 
Electrical Engineering Consultation and Design 
Website: https://www.seventransistorlabs.com/
Reply to
Tim Williams

Oh dear. Now you'll not only be destroying your physical health but your mind as well. :)

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Reply to
Cursitor Doom

Yes, I know. Life sucks.

Sylvia.

Reply to
Sylvia Else

If only it was that simple to cure your stupidity. Maybe you should try concrete overshoes to lose even more of the blubber between your ears? 100 pounds for each of your feet would be a good start.

Reply to
Michael Terrell

You know this? A personal trainer is always required?

Perhaps the "right person" is self.

Reply to
krw

In that case, swimming is a much better exercise than walking.

Reply to
krw

Only if the water is over six feet deep! :)

Reply to
Michael Terrell

When I go to a medical center, I check their health. That is because I lost 60 pounds using the three switch method.

Reply to
omnilobe

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try concrete overshoes to lose even more of the blubber between your ears?

100 pounds for each of your feet would be a good start.

So, what? You could have lost that weight by having a better diet.

I lost over 40 pounds in one month, after I was discharged from Active duty . I suddenly had a huge appetite, and I was eating up to 5,000 calories per day.

My weight stayed between 165 -180 pounds for almost three decades before I spent two years, bedridden. I had no TV, and no Internet to switch off. I d idn't even own a car or truck to drive during that time, yet I gained over

100 pounds because I was an diagnosed Diabetic.

I had reached 297 pounds, before I was finally admitted to the VA healthcar e system. I had been lied to about my eligibility for those two years, and most of a third year. Even then, I was lied to again when I was told that I couldn't use the VA hospital until I was assigned a PCP. I couldn't drive more than a couple miles without losing all use of my hands. It turned out that I had both Carpal Tunnel and nerve damage to my hands.

Reply to
Michael Terrell

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