Anything with meat in it.....

Stop bunging it up her arse then!!!

I'm not sure that was entirely relevant.

Perhaps, in days gone by, a delicate fingering. However now we have the double glazing and a dishwasher... Well, it's just not British.

DNA

Go on admit it - you've stopped having sex with your wife because she doesn't enjoy being knobbed by someone who hasn't washed for nearly a year!!!

He probably can't find it under all that crud, after a year. For all he knows, its rotted and fallen off.

Don't know if you get the Blackadder comedy where you are, but Genome reminds me of the time machine episode where their first trip back in time they are attacked by dinosaurs - to defend themselves Blackadder waves a pair of Baldrick's underpants on the end of a stick, this wipes out the dinosaurs earlier than was supposed to happen and changes history - uh-oh!!

Its on, but way too late, at two in the morning. I've seen a few episodes, including the cross dressing highwayman who hated squirrels. He turns the woman in, gets the reward, then his boss finds it and spends it.

maybe she should change her seasonings?