- posted
17 years ago
Staples.
WANG, get in there you bastard.
FUCK!
OK.... You were just sacrificial. Let's line things up.......
WANG.... bugger...
CRUNCH.....shit...
Ahhhhhhhh hhhhhhh I know.
Next time I get asked for my Christmas Wish I'll wish a BIG FUCK OFF AND DIE STAPLER.
Next year I can suggest some BIG FUCK OFF AND DIE STAPLES.
Sorted.
DNA
Simply not true.
The sock is the larval form of the coat hanger.
They metamorphise in dark closets.
-- Many thanks, Don Lancaster voice phone: (928)428-4073
If you try out one of Staples' (the company's) new-fangled staplers
Your first link arsk me for ZIP cod.
This do not cause busted blud vesl.
Being kunning + read instructions am enter five fig number 12345.
So system let me look at produkt.
Sure look like puff too me.
DNA
Nonsense. The sock (singular, because when a pair of socks go into the laundry only one comes out) is the adult form. Its function in the adult stage is (of course) to reproduce by broadcasting its spores, which we call "lint." Ancient legend supposed that socks eventually developed into much larger forms called "sacks," but modern scientific methods have put the lie to such balderdash -- although, it must be admitted, the legend still survives among ill-educated countryfolk who still believe in Bigfoot.
Immature bicycles are coat hangers, immature coat hangers are paper clips, immature paper clips are staples. Period. What part of "Darwin is laughing at you while riding backwards on a bicycle and whistling `Dixie'" don't you understand?
-- Eric Sosman esosman@acm-dot-org.invalid
A sordid tale, indeed. %-}
Aha - you still fail to understand the reason for odd socks, the sock-wash wormhole, which also assists their genetic distribution.
When two machines are both washing socks at the same time, every so often the conditions are right for a sock to tunnel through space-time and emerge in the other machine, thus creating an odd sock in both machines. Half such odd socks are unrecognised by anyone in the household, for obvious reasons.
I'm still hoping to see a hyperspace teleport device built on the same physical principle :-).
Clifford Heath.
This can be easily overcome by tuning half of the pairs of socks inside out. This inverts the probability function of tunneling for one of the socks This cancels the overall probability of tunneling event taking place.
Regards,
Boris Mohar
Got Knock? - see: Viatrack Printed Circuit Designs (among other things)
void _-void-_ in the obvious place
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