kislo,
The parasitics are the extracted RLC from the transmission lines in the package. The package specific models have a min, typ, and max value.
The simulators take the RLC, and create a multi-section t-line from pi-models based on these values (as it is not an R, and L, and a C).
For per pin parasitics, you disable the RLC (comment it out of the model) and replace it with the package t-line of the proper length in your simulation.
Xilinx supports package maps of per pin time delay, or per pin t-line length to a package ball in 5mm 'buckets'. This length is also used by those who are designing wide buses which must arrive all at the same time. The concern is that for the highest speed buses we need to go to
1 mm resolution. Perhaps we do. In any event, if you really need the exact length, you may request this from your Xilinx FAE.
Austin