OT: Surveys

Sensible people don't waste time filling out surveys. So all survey results are the statistical analysis of nonsensible people.

I give them a fake name, address and if they ask for a phone number, I give them the direct line to the county jail or something like the suicide hotline. Give the telemarketers something to chew on. 8-)

"Statistics means not having to say you're certain"... a needlework in progress by my wife ;-) ...Jim Thompson

Say "Cool, hold on a second..." and put the phone down. Waste their time.

ive them the direct line to the county jail or something like the suicide h otline. Give the telemarketers something to chew on. 8-)

When I was last at home and the landline phone rang, I would look at the CI D and see an unfamiliar number which indicated to me that it must be a tele pest. I would answer, say hello and when the telepest started talking, I wo uld start screaming at them like a crazed Vietnamese immigrant yelling,"WHO ARE YOU? WHY YOU CAW HERE? I NO TELL YOU CAW HERE! I DOAN KNOW YOU! WHY YO U CAW ME? WHY YOU BODDA ME? YOU NO CAW HERE NO MOE! YOU LEE ME ARONE! I EAT YOU DOG! I BROW UP YOU HOUSE! Then I'd slam the phone down. Some of them w ere idiotic enough to call back. 8-)

I used to pass the phone to my 2-year old daughter! :)

I stopped doing that now she's a bit older, in case they start swearing and she learns some new words...

The problem with handing the phone to a child is that the child may know yo ur name and address if you've taught it to them to give to an authority fig ure in case the child gets lost. One of my lady friends got a call from sch ool about her daughter. The teachers couldn't get the little girl to tell t hem anything. It turns out that she was taught not to talk to strangers. 8- )

TLDR

Short version... most surveys are a PITA, seem to ask silly questions and are often provided in a manner that insults the intelligence.

Yes, I sometimes take online surveys even though I often have no idea how they will make use of the info.

I often report product problems to vendors through their web sites. Sometimes I get a responsive reply, other times I simply receive a coupon for a free product (I'm telling you I didn't think your food was fit to eat and you want to give me more?) Often I hear back nothing at all.

I also receive various junk mail with business reply mail envelopes. I stuff the entire item into the reply and send it back to them. Why should I pay to dispose of their garbage?

So, you never ask your *customers* what they think about YOUR products, service, pricing, etc.?

Or, do you ASK... but, then throw away their answers because they are "nonsensible people"?

I would assume it an important issue to know how *to* bias a question when conducting a (biased) survey AND how *not* to bias a question when looking for unbiased results.

Sure he does. They tell them what they think every time they hand him a pile of money.

You don't read very well. He often talks about customers who have requested new, or modified, products.

I would assume that if one were really serious about listening to customers, one would go out and *visit* them, instead of sending them a link to some web site designed by someone with no clue.

I came to the same conclusion. At one point there were occasions when I did have 5 minutes and sometimes said 'go on then,' but the process quickly st alled as they failed to grasp 'I don't give out personal data to strangers, ' or their idiot survey refused to proceed because I hadnt given them one o f the answers they wanted to hear.

I took an online survey yesterday. I'm in the market for a new phone service, the first company has a link to check portability, my number isn't portable with them. I won't change if I can't keep my number. The second company, forces you to signup and go through this to find out if they can port you number.

"Please be informed that you can switch your wireless or landline telephone number to Straight Talk Wireless. The number requested to be ported will be checked at the initiation of the transfer process to ensure that the number is active and eligible for porting. Please note that the port-in process may take up to two (2) business days for wireless phone numbers, but may take longer for landline phone numbers.

You will need to provide some basic information to Straight Talk in order to process your transfer:

? Your name, address, phone number (number to be reached at other than number requested for porting), the last four (4) digits of your social security number and the billing account number of your current service provider.

? Your number must be active in order to transfer it to Straight Talk. The deactivation will happen automatically through the transfer process.

? If you are currently under contract with your provider, you might want to check on your status as it relates to any early termination fees, as those fees would still apply.

To begin porting your telephone number to Straight Talk Wireless, please click on the following link:

Certainly not in a statistical survey. We talk to them about specific real issues, when we have a reason to. We find out in the course of business what they feel about our products and service, without calling them and saying "Hello Mr Jones, how are you today? ...."

I don't fill out surveys, online or on the phone.

Few of my customers are nonsensible. It's pretty much true that incompetant customers won't be in business for long.

Sometimes we get into contact with people who are pretty obviously going to fail; we help them, but don't go overboard and invest too much of our time. And sometimes we form working relationships with people who know what they are doing and have a good shot at success; we bet on them. No survey is going to tell us which is which. I suspect that most surveys produce only statistical results anyhow.

Their nonsense statistics will be just as valid without my input. Of course, I blow my chance at willing a $100 gift certificate or a wide-screen TV or whatever insulting prize is being offered.

(I know for a fact that many of those prizes are "won" by the people doing the survey.)

I did recently fill out a pretty long online survey, from one of our customers, about the business relationship. They hired a survey company to do it. I did it because a logistics person in Big Company was tasked to get the surveys done, and he was pestering me to complete mine. It was about 12 screens of silly blather and very annoying to complete. Every checkbox had to be filled out to proceed, even when the question was meaningless to my company. I checked those at random.

In several places, they asked me to fill out a text box with additional observations. It would not allow me to get past an empty box, so I typed either gibberish, or a statement that the situation was too complex for the little box, and that someone should call me and discuss the actual issue. I know they never will - that's too real, and all they want is statistics.

A real "survey" would be someone who actually understands the relationship and the technical issues, talking to a corresponding customer about the actual projects being worked on. Not some hired droid reading a script, or some online form to fill out.

Purchase orders are a form of survey.

But we do talk to customers. Complex products inevitably invoke questions and need support, so we have a lot of geek-to-geek emails and phone calls.

And existing products. The end users are the valuable contacts, not the purchasing people. Sometimes the only way we can find out who the end users are, is to have them call us. It would be useless to survey the admins who cut the POs.

A lot of our POs are placed by 3rd party companies who do the purchasing for the big companies. They don't know who the end users are, or what the gear does, or anything but part numbers and prices and dates. They just order what some computer tells them to order.

We make it a point to research the customer's science and technology and competitors, to understand what they are trying to do, to talk to them about specifics, to collaborate on ideas and designs.

Yes. Customers are annoyed by formula surveys but love to talk about what they are really doing. Sometimes meeting in person, in front of a whiteboard, is magic. That is not a survey.

I hate the sort of question "rate on a scale of one to ten how much you like ..." when I have no opinion at all about the issue.

Don't walk, RUN away from those vultures. They don't even say what the hi-speed bps is but they say that it may reduce to 64kb/s if you use up your 3 gigs.

Why do they need the 4 digits of your SSN? That's fishy. They are not a bank. Screw-'em.

I am, not so sure they are not a sort-of bank. People can buy things using a cell phone now.

That is to port your number. I just switched carriers and had to produce various information.... although I don't recall giving any part of my SSN. Now that I think about it that is a bit fishy. Many cell carriers are international and most of their customers don't have SSNs. They did need the PIN and other info for my online account with the old carrier though. The old carrier even had a FAQ listing about how to find all the info needed.

did have 5 minutes and sometimes said 'go on then,' but the process quickly stalled as they failed to grasp 'I don't give out personal data to strange rs,' or their idiot survey refused to proceed because I hadnt given them on e of the answers they wanted to hear.

Last survey I paid any attention to asked to rate from 1-10 'I felt I was t reated like an individual.' That's where that survey ended, what a moronic question.

NT